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It is impossible for relationships between people to exist only on good terms. True connection is always built upon the ruins of what was destroyed. Only through experiencing both ascent and descent, joy and pain, can a person truly value love, friendship, and closeness. If we never go through these internal storms, we will not cherish what we have.
Destruction is a necessary part of development. When relationships collapse or seem to fall apart, it awakens in us the awareness of how fragile and precious connection is. These feelings serve as protection. They remind us to guard our relationships carefully, to never take them for granted.
After all, we are two egoists facing each other. Can we simply remove our egoism and become harmless, naïve beings? Of course not. We collide, we hurt one another, and through despair we come to understand what it truly means to aspire for goodness. With time and experience, we no longer need the ups and downs that marked our youth, but consciously choose peace, understanding, and love.
Such maturity only comes after passing through many contrasts. We need to accumulate a full spectrum of feelings, pain, anger, longing, and tenderness, and only then can we rise above them, with the knowledge of how to avoid what once caused suffering. That is how we form lasting healthy relationships.
Based on KabTV’s “News with Dr. Michael Laitman” with Kabbalist Dr. Michael Laitman on August 14, 2025. Written/edited by students of Kabbalist Dr. Michael Laitman.
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