How can we turn a wedding into a truly connecting event, one that warms the hearts of all the guests and gives the young couple the strength to build their relationship on a solid foundation?
“We invite you to a special event of connection.” Something along those lines should already appear in the invitation. “We see our wedding as an opportunity to build a deep bond among all those who are dear to us, and we hope to create together a circle of connection that will support us all.”
The goal is to create the feeling that we all belong to one family. Therefore, the central theme guiding the entire event should be “connection in a circle.”
It is worth arranging the seating in the form of a large circle, so that everyone can see one another and feel as though they are sitting around a single table. Activities that bring people together should be encouraged: games that connect everyone, songs sung together, and friends who have been prepared in advance to invite guests into circle dances. Older people, younger people, children—everyone together. Everyone should share in the joy.
Anything that brings people closer to one another is worthwhile. Of course, it should be done in a way that suits the audience, i.e., simple and natural things that warm the heart and evoke feelings of connection, home, and family. What is certainly unnecessary are extravagant productions, grand displays, three wedding dresses, and the like. A wedding is not a performance.
The blessings and good wishes should focus on the connection between the bride and groom and on the connection between the new couple and society as a whole. The family is the basic unit of society, and we are all happy that a new couple is joining us. Every wedding represents a new breakthrough, the beginning of a new life for us all. The bond between the bride and groom matters to us, and the more successful they are, the more successful we all are.
Therefore, on this evening we want to draw closer together. Whether we know each other or not, we are one people whose foundation and future depend solely on unity. From this moment on, we all share the same mission: to be responsible for ensuring that this marriage is blessed, that the couple succeeds in becoming one, and that they establish a wonderful family that contributes its unique qualities to society as a whole.
With this intention, we strengthen our bonds, within every couple and among all of us as a community, and then accompany the bride and groom through their wedding ceremony.
From a broader perspective, a wedding is not merely an event where people arrive, place something in an envelope, offer a hug and a kiss, eat, drink, and head home. A wedding is a declaration. It is a commitment by society to support the young couple, and a commitment by the couple to become a healthy cell within a society that aspires to be like one family.
If we approach weddings in such a way, and if we build educational and social processes that broaden this understanding, then every wedding will become a renewal for us all, the birth of a new degree of connection: among ourselves and with the force of love that lies at the foundation of creation.
Based on “New Life 167 – Ceremonies – Weddings” with Kabbalist Dr. Michael Laitman. Written/edited by students of Kabbalist Dr. Michael Laitman.
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